We've all done it..

Hi everybody! So, I plan on making this post kinddaaa different from the others, ya know change it up. There will still be pictures so don't get all pissy. Anyway, really the only reason I'm changing it for today's post is because, in all honesty, I feel like I'm getting a wee bit to generic with my format's and shit like that. It's not because I'm out of ideas or because I'm lazy, it's because I want to get some more variety.

So, instead of a story, I'm going to go over a list (not super long, not crazy short) of things I've done and I'm pretty sure you've all done (comically of course).

#1) Walk into a room, get distracted by some asshole, walk out of room without retrieving whatever you wanted to get.
#2) Feeling hungry but because the big game (baseball, football, basketball or whatever sport you prefer) is on so you don't wanna get up.
#3) When on FB,  literally scrolling through a wasteland of "-insert Kings of Leon or any country song deemed 'deep''
#4) Pressing down even harder on buttons of a remote control even though we know it has weak batteries (I've lost a few remotes because of that).
#5) When reading something clearly out of order thinking "idiot" then re-reading over it a few minutes later, only to realize it was in the right order and your brain is a dick.

#6) (Guys) Trying to figure out why girls post pictures of there feet when in a group...it's called Facebook not Footbook.
#7) Being friends with somebody yet you forget how you met and why you're friends.
#8) Watching a poker game on ESPN and trying to figure out why you're watching a poker game on ESPN.
#9) Playing any type of sports video game and trying to figure out how the hell you're losing to somebody who has never even played before.
#10) Losing all self confidence after looking in the mirror. (That's more for you guys, I've nnneeevveerr lost self confidence)
#11) Anything that sounds great in your head about politics or religion, can and will, make you look like a total tool.
#12) We all have our favorite happy mood song, sad mood song, tired song, writing a paper song, getting ready for a sporting event song, driving in the car and attempting to not crash the car song because you're focused on the song.
#13) Re-creating an awkward situation in your head over and over and over and over and over again until you're ready to jump off your nearest bridge or building.

#14) Doing a math problem then thinking: "When am I going to use this shit..."
#15) Texting someone in the same room about somebody else in the same room.
#16) Catching yourself in the middle of a sentence because you realize that if you say it you may come across as: Racist, sexist, extremist, overly-religious, Marxist, communistic.
#17) Over rationalizing something to the point where you have created a completely new situation.
#18) Actually thinking something good you do will earn you respect and honor....bahahahahahahahahahaha.
#19) Reading something terrible about today's society and deep down hoping the world will end because this shit is just getting out of control.
#20) Still trying to figure out why girls post pictures of there feet on facebook..
#21) Slowly sinking into your chair as you get more comfortable on your computer.
#22) Eating then thinking about those starving African kids you saw on that TV commercial...-slow gulp-
#23) Telling yourself I will call it a night after this -feel in the blank- and deciding two hours later: "Meh, I can pull an all-nighter"..then passing out on the couch.
#24) Secretly praying that Tebow will win MVP.
#25) Thinking to yourself: "I'm honestly glad I wasn't born into a celebrity couple, I'm not sure if I would want to be named Trenton Serenity Orphée Green World Peace Jones"


So there ya have it, the list of things we've all done at point or another. I'm sorry it's not longer but my brain is tired. Bye Everybody! =))

Every first day has it's thorns.

Hi, everybody! So this is my first day of writing a blog and I'm kinda bad with introductions, so I might as well tell you everything about me. I love music, sports, comedy and not being dead. Just like every other human being! It's always a plus when you wake up. Period. I'm a strong believer in living life to the fullest. There's an old saying that goes something like "If you're not alive, you're dead, and if you're living like you're dead, you ain't living". All right, so it's not that old...considering I just made it up. I have a tendency to act a bit...strange. Case in point: one of my favorite words in the whole wide world is "xenobiology" which means the scientific study of extraterrestrial life or life beyond planet Earth. I also like reeaallyyy random facts. Like out of left field, where the eff did that come from?! Like I said, I like living, and a part of living is knowing random knowledge that will never come in handy in any situation whatsoever. I think all of that describes me pretty well!

Now let's get down to the main point of this particular post: FIRSTS. Like my first day of baseball. I was about 8 years old and had no knowledge of the game whatsoever, but like any other 8 year old boy with ADHD (I believe every 8yo kid has ADHD, no matter their medical history). I tried to blend in and just be cool while running around like a chicken with it's head cut off by a crazed butcher. But seeing as I couldn't run, throw, hit or tie my shoes like a baseball player, I just did what came naturally..curl up in a ball and hope to God above that nothing was hit toward me. I mean c'mon! How many 8 year old power hitters do you know? Well, apparently there are quite a few, and having to be physically moved by your coach is a real morale breaker. So he sent me to go catch fly balls being hit off a tee. A little tip: NEVER RUN BACKWARDS IF YOU CAN'T RUN WELL FORWARD. I almost knocked a kid's block off while running backwards. I got snapped at and almost ended up crying. (We later ended up being close friends). But, no. I would NOT cry! I was a man! (With an extremely high voice who still wore his Buzz Lightyear tidy whiteys). I had to keep my pride and go about my first day and make sure I didn't pee myself when I got a ball smoked right at me. But by the end of the day, I returned to my mommy's van and all was well with my string cheese in one hand and my Capri-Sun in the other. My coach (who is a family friend of ours) told me I did great for being so new to baseball. I later read the little league rulebook, and apparently coaches must make the less talented children feel better by saying that. I DID NOT CARE THOUGH! I was a baseball player now, and I felt like one for the rest of the season too! There are two morals of the story: 1) If you have a ball hit at you, fake your death and pray the EMTs have cookies. 2) First days are always tough no matter who you are. It doesn't matter if you're Chuck Norris or an average Malik.

I hope you enjoyed my first of many posts to come! Remember, if you have a problem, you know where to read the most humorous stories..and if Fox is down, I'm always here too! Byee! =)